A man and a woman slept placidly and deeply as innocent babies.
Suddenly, as at about 3 o'clock in the morning, noises are heard outside the house. The woman is startled and utterly astonished, she says to the man: Get up! That must be my husband.
The guy gets upright and naked, jumps madly through the window, sticks a good fuck against the cornice and then another against the ground, then stumbles with a creeper with thorns, stands up, and naked begins to run towards his car.
A few minutes later he returns and says furiously:
I'm your husband!
The woman answers: And you stupid ...? Let's see .... why do you run? ...
THE VENUE WOMEN.
VENGANZA 1
Today my daughter turns 21 ... and I am very happy because it is the last payment of alimony I give her, so I called my little girl to come to my house and when I arrived I said:
"My dear, I want you to take this check to your mother's house and tell her to:
This is the last fucking check that you will receive from me in all that is left of your fucking life !!! And I want you to tell me the expression he puts on his face '.
So my daughter went to hand over the check.
I was anxious to know what the witch had to say and what face to face.
When my little girl came in, I immediately asked her,
"What did your mother tell you?"
"He told me that he was just waiting for this day to tell you that you are not my father!"
VENGANZA 2
A man who always bothered his wife, spent a day at the house of friends to accompany him to the airport to leave his wife who was traveling to Paris.
At the exit of immigration, in front of everybody, he wishes him a good trip and in a mocking tone he shouts:
- Love, do not forget to bring me a beautiful French girl Ha ha ha !!
She lowered her head and embarked very upset.
The woman spent fifteen days in France.
The husband again asked his friends to accompany him to the airport to receive her.
When you see her arrive, the first thing she shouts at you is:
-And my love did you bring me my French?
"I did everything possible," she replied.
"Now we just have to pray for a girl to be born."
VENGANZA 3
The husband, on his deathbed, calls his wife. With a hoarse, already weak voice, he says:
"Very well, my hour has arrived, but first I want to make a confession.
"No, no, no, you should not make any effort.
"But, woman, you must
The husband insists
"You must die in peace."
"I want to confess something."
"All right, all right. Speaks!
"I've had relationships with your sister, your mom, and your best friend.
-I know, I know! That's why I poisoned you !!!
VENGANZA 4
There was a woman in a court and the judge asked her,
"Maria, I heard you killed your husband.
"It's like I killed him and I did not kill him, playing flippers.
"Now, Maria, explain that to me.
"I wanted to wash my calzonis, and my old man arrives, pick up the bucket of water and he fires it, and he says," How could I rain? " Intoncis qui my anger and grab ditirjente. I throw it in his face and read: 'as qui ti neva !!!'.
Intoncis qui gras a fist of stones and my makes: 'as qui ti hail!' And then I qui my anger more and I grab stones and read: 'as qui ti hails so too !!!'
Dispuis grabs the whip of his horse and makes me: 'as qui tiililampaguea!
Intonsis qui my grasp well unconvinced and as I do not traiba belt I grab il il machete and I do ...:
ZASSSSSS !!! ... !!
HOW WILL YOU START A DARK RAY CABRON !!!!
Various jokes: Vindictive women video to die of laughter
MORE RISES MORE CHISTES
He treats me like a dog
- Tell me. What is the reason you want to divorce your husband?
- My husband treats me like a dog.
- You mistreat her, hit her?
- No, he wants me to be faithful ....
Punching pan
This is a drunk who meets a friend down the street and says:
- Hey, you know what? Yesterday I arrived home drunk at midnight and my wife gave me a cacerolazo for every stroke.
- And you have learned the lesson?
- Yes, from now on I will arrive at one, which hurts less!
The washing-machine
A man goes on the beach with his wife, and she asks him to buy her a bikini, to which he says:
"With that body of washing machine, do not even think about it.
They keep walking and the woman insists:
- Well, buy me that dress.
And the husband repeats:
- With that body of washing machine do not think it.
Spend the day and at night, already in bed, the husband says to the wife:
- So, old lady, shall we start the washing machine?
And the woman says:
- For that rag rag, better wash it by hand.
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